Jesus vs McDonalds

Starting today from 23:00 to 05:00 a laser NASA satellite will measure the temperature of the population (rectally). Please stick your bottom out of the open window towards the stars. Hold an open ID in your right hand. 

“Welcome to McDonald’s, what’ll it be?”
Jesus whispering “5000 Filet-o-fish, and hurry”
Waiter: “5000 FILETS DAN”
Jesus: “Shh, keep your voice down”

If Jesus was born today